It's Showtime!

As Joe Gideon said, "It's show time, folks." That was Roy Scheider playing a Bob Fosse character in a movie written by (and about) and directed by Bob Fosse. One look in the bathroom mirror, downing a handfull of benzedrine, eyes sparkling, and yes, "It's shooooow time, folks!"

Well, we're here. the presidential primaries start in about three weeks. Let's see who's running:

Hillary. Nope. I'd love to see a woman president, but not her. She's a communist. And, she doesn't have any leadership experience. This is the end of the first year of her second term as senator from New York. She's authored nothing of note. She's been the quintissential back bencher. What has she managed/overseen/run?

Obama. Maybe. A Chicago pol who mixed it up downstate before going to Washington. Maybe he's got the toughness underneath the charm. Let him duke it out during the presidential campaign to see what he's made of.

Edwards. Not a chance. He's a personal-injury lawyer for God's sake! Doesn't that make your stomach churn? C'mon, the guy's way too pretty, and knows it. Empty suit.

Richardson. Probably. Lot's of experience. Solid. Good ideas. Not too weird. As a Whig, I probably wouldn't vote for him, but he'd be okay.

Romney. Uh-uh. I don't care what they say, too many folks think it's a cult. Evangelicals and fundamentalists across the country are lined up against this guy. Too bad, too. He's probably the best of the lot. Straight middle-of-the-road with executive experience. Smart. Big smart. Decent sort with a good family. Down in the hookworm belt, though, they'd rather see Satan elected.

Giuliani. Naaaaah. Too much mob. Too much Noooo Yahk City. Executive experience, good under pressure. But...he's dirty. Too many connections. Too many problems. The social liberalism won't sink him, but the ties to the bad guys will.

Paul/Kucinich. Only if you live on the planet Zorkon 9. Neither one of the fools has a chance. They're almost amusing (and Dennis' wife is hot!). Ron Paul is smart for a doctor, too.

Huckabee. Pleeeeeze. No way. There's a Jimmie Swaggart moment ahead of us, mark my words. Running solely on the Christian Theological Ticket will not get him to president. Nor should it. The guy's an out-of-the-closet big government liberal. His knowledge of foreign policy is about as much as Obama's. Maybe less.

Thompson. In a perfect world, it would be the ticket of Thompson-Duncan Hunter that takes office January 20, 2009. The world is not perfect. Fred doesn't have the fire in his belly. Duncan is too patriotic for today's metrosexual, multicultural, universal citizen of the world. Alas, they will both be footnotes when the history of the decline and fall of this wonderful country is written.

Whom have I left out? Dodd? Biden? Tancredo? Keyes? Gilmore? Buchanan? Jackson? Sharpton? Dogs barking in the night.

Update -- Richardson's swung over into the moonbat camp with Dennis and Ron. He wants to include alternative medicine in a prescription benefit. That's right, get your ginko biloba on the taxpayers' nickel. Last Thursday, after Bhutto was assassinated, Richardson wants to cut off aid to Musharref. It's deja vu all over again -- another protesting pretentious lefty.